Week Two of a long-awaited freedom

Instead of my usual gym routine, this morning I decided to climb a mountain. The view was incredible. It's going to take a long time before I get over how nice it is to have both of my children in school.This is Cathedral Rock. The trail takes you to the right edge of this mountain and you end up in the middle of Kyle Canyon with an incredible 360 degree view. Its been so long since I've hiked this trail, I had forgotten that a uprooted double stump lets you know you're getting close.

A decade

No, it hasn't been a decade since I've made a blog post but gosh it sure feels like it. I've been busy reading my pharmacology textbook. Such is.

It was this same week 10 years ago that I was finished with high school, packing up, and heading out on a new adventure. I spent that summer working in my dad's auto shops and on the weekends I hit a few garage sales to find dishes and silverware for my college apartment. I was 110% ready to move out of my parents home. My parents were good parents and we got along well. I was just that kid who couldn't wait to grow up. That summer was one full of anticipation, excitement, and wonder. This summer has been too but in different ways. I have loved watching my kids explore new ideas and places.


Last night we all climbed into my big bed and my 7 yr old girly read a chapter of a children's mystery book to me. She has fallen in love with mystery and fantasy books this summer! I LOVE that she reads all on her own. Not only does she know the words, but you can ask her about the plot and characters. Her face lights up as she retells the story. Who knew that a little girl could make me so happy! This summer was also the last one before my baby starts real school. Kindergarten here we come! He has been a bit more clingy lately. I think all this talk about school is worrying him just a bit. Change is never easy.


With the passing of a decade (and my children staying with my dad for a week) I have found myself reflecting on life. In some ways I am exactly where I thought I would be, a wife, mother, and soon to be nurse practitioner. However, I discovered a lot of things I never saw coming and life has been richer than I ever anticipated.

Stress and Pregnancy

This week in pathophysiology, we are studying the stress response and all the problems that result. Of course I have to find out how it affects women and pregnancy.
The stress response is even more pronounced during pregnancy. The problem with this is that the hormones released cross the placenta and affect the developing baby. This can lead to low birth weight, preterm delivery, and a range of functional, behavioral, and emotional deficits in the child. In the mother it can lead to poorer attachment to the baby and increased risk for postpartum depression. The difficulty in treating pregnant mothers is that the pharmaceuticals that could be used cross the placenta and also affect the baby. Today however I found a great research journal. The Limerick Lullaby project was a study to see how singing lullabies during pregnancy affected stress. The results were great. Singing lullabies significantly reduced stress, anxiety, and depression during pregnancy with improved fetal outcomes. Don't like to sing? Music with a soft melody and tempo of 60-80 beats per min is also effective.

Spotlight Dance Competition

How to put into words how I feel about my children?!? Riley has been a little superstar.....


In the fall, Riley auditioned for dance and was placed on the same team she was on last year. After a few weeks, they asked if Riley would move up a team. It was a hard decision because she didn't want to leave her friends. The new team was also challenging, but she hung in there and was able to keep up. This weekend Riley had her first dance competition with her new team. She was amazing and was having so much fun! Their tap number won a judges choice award for the best tap number! Go Riley!

To Do Lists and the 3rd Annual Craft Night

This term I am drowning. I've always been an overachiever when it comes to school but this term is kicking my BBBBBBBut. Yes, I'm getting B's in both my classes so far. Because there is so much material for me to cover, I've tried to come up with better ways at staying organized. Enter- the revolving to do list. I divided up things I need to do by categories. This really helped and kept me from feeling overwhelmed. My categories in no particular order included Self (emotional and physical development), Organization, Cleaning, Pathophysiology, Economics and Finance of Health Care, Parenting, Motorcycling (a new hobby I'm learning), Social, and Sleep. Then I listed each day and the things I wanted to do that day. Because of the categories, I was able to balance my day. If I worked hard but didn't get everything done, I moved tasks to an upcoming day where I thought I could get it done. Then I crossed it off. Everything got crossed off every day. It was nice. This may seem counter-productive but it really worked for me this week and kept me motivated. I felt I focused time in every category in a balanced manner. I like feeling organized and in control of my life. The revolving to do list has been good.

The new method kept me so organized, I was able to start planning for the 3rd Annual Craft Night! For the past couple years, John and Aspen have gone to the Monster Truck Jam and while they're out, Riley and I invite our friends over for a night of crafting. It is so much fun and I'm so excited. I have found some easy crafts the girls might enjoy- toothpick tops and piggy banks. I'm still on the lookout for a craft the women would all enjoy. Is there anything you've been wanting to try or make and haven't found the time? I'm looking for a project that is amazing but can be finished in a couple hours or less. Count this as your official invitation-March 26th, 5-8:30, my house. Bring your scissors. We will also be eating & drinking so bring your favorite dish to show-off and share. I'm making dessert. Please let me know if you are planning on coming at least a couple days before so I can have enough supplies for everyone. Woohoo! Can't wait.

Reflection

A week ago, my grandpa had a severe stroke. It hasn't effected me like it has my mother but it has definitely slowed me down. I also watched friends struggle this week with finances, chronic health issues and child custody drama. Needless to say all these events have had me thinking about life and what is really important. What made my grandma survive this week? The support of her children. What got my friends through their trials this week? Support from friends and family. People are really what make life worth living.

This week I also reflected upon some of the happiest times in my life.... I had a really happy childhood and teenage years. Why? I had very supportive parents and close groups of friends. I also had amazing roommates in college and had good times with them. People have been there during the happiest moments. Now I am going to go out on a limb here and I know its extreme but I'm just thinking. I may be right and I may be wrong. I don't think monogomy is the healthiest structure for adults. After being married a couple years, I found myself in a catch 22 way of thinking, I knew my husband sincerely loved me but I didn't feel loved like I did when I was young. People need people and I've come to realize that one person may not be able to provide enough love for anyone to feel loved. How unfair it was for me to expect John to provide me with all the emotional and social support I needed. I would guess that a lot of people find marriage can be lonely too. Everyone says that marriage is what you are supposed to do, especially in Utah. They tell you that marriage is hard but worth it, leaving out the reasons why its hard. Its hard because it is not natural... people need people. I would also argue that some people can find a lot of satisfaction in marriage because they also have a lot of family and social support outside of marriage. I am saying that clicks are natural because people need people. I am not saying that there isn't a need for a deep, long term, loving relationship because I think that there is but I don't think it is enough to really make people happy.